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    Sheldon Timothy Herrington Jr. sentenced to 40 years for the murder of Jimmie “Jay” Lee

    Sheldon Timothy Herrington Jr. sentenced to 40 years for the murder of Jimmie “Jay” Lee

    Ruth Adams Ball and Lisa Barber advance to runoff in District 2 election commissioner race

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    Ole Miss Esports relocates as E. F. Yerby Conference Center is set for demolition in 2026

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    ‘Wicked: For Good’ is just okay

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    Ask A&C: What’s your Thanksgiving hot take?

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    A leopard cannot change its spots, and Lane Kiffin cannot escape his tendencies.

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    danah boyd: Journalism connects people in a healthy social fabric

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Ask a Philosopher: Why do other people not understand me?

You feel like people don’t understand you. You’re right — no one understands anyone! While first-hand understanding is impossible, we are able to strengthen the ties that connect us by giving people more data to work from.

OpinionDeskbyOpinionDesk
April 28, 2025
Reading Time: 2 mins read

In collaboration with the Rebel Philosophers’ Society, Ask a Philosopher is a column inviting readers to present a dilemma in exchange for a philosophical take from the society’s members. Each response is attributed to the philosopher or concept that inspired it. 

Dilemma: I feel that other people do not understand me. Is it a problem with myself? Is it a problem with others?

The “problem of other minds,” traced all the way back to Descartes, poses an important inquiry in philosophy: How can we be certain that the people we interact with truly have consciences of their own and that they are not merely automations of our matrix-induced imagination?  

While the phrase “walk in someone else’s shoes” is certainly heartwarming, “the problem of other minds” postulates that it is, in fact, impossible to literally experience another’s life. 

All we pioneer is our own perception, which, as philosophers note, is notoriously unreliable. Is the tall figure in a trench coat a calculating detective or three cartoonishly stacked racoons?

Though there is no clear cut answer, many solutions involve conclusions drawn from analogy. In other words, because other people act and say things like we do, it makes sense that they would have a mind similar to our own. 

You feel like people don’t understand you. You’re right — no one understands anyone! While first-hand understanding is impossible, we are able to strengthen the ties that connect us by giving people more data to work from.

That prim Sherlockian figure in a trench coat is devouring pizza. I devour pizza because I enjoy its taste. Therefore, they probably like the taste of pizza too, whether they’re a pile of trash pandas enjoying scraps or a crime investigator with a penchant for Papa Johns. 

To help others understand you, tell them about yourself. Act in ways that show who you really are: eat pizza if you enjoy its cheesy taste or wear a trench coat when in a particularly investigative mood.

In understanding that no one understands each other, we can bypass the faulty assumptions that divide us. Be less mysterious and more accessible, and perhaps, not only will others understand you more — but you can understand yourself more.  

Tags: Ask a PhilosopherdescartesRebel Philosophers' Society
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