One of the biggest leaps students make when entering college is sharing a living space with someone outside of their family. On top of that, many students find themselves assigned to share a bedroom or apartment with a virtual stranger.
Luckily, living with roommates is not as daunting as it seems — it could even lead to life-long friendships. To make the best of the experience, University of Mississippi students shared their advice for an ideal roommate relationship.
Reach out before moving in
Kayleigh Capps, a freshman political science major, moved into her dorm in August. Although she was randomly assigned a roommate, Capps said the pairing has worked out well. “My roommate is really good,” Capps said. “She’s one of my best friends here so far.”
Capps advised students in similar situations to “just reach out before you move in.”
For Quade Beasley, a junior English major, getting in contact with his roommate was ultimately what led him to choose the pairing.
“What actually cinched the decision for me was a meme (my roommate) posted on their (Instagram) page,” Beasley said. “I feel like humor is a good way to get people.”
Communicate
Offline communication between roommates is just as important. Isaiah Bell, an allied health studies major and self-described introvert, has used regular communication with his roommate to maintain his personal space and time.
“First and foremost, definitely make sure your communication is up to par,” Bell said. “A big part for me is communicating with my roommate to see when he will or won’t be in the room … because that way, at least, you get a bit of time to yourself.”
Beasley echoed Bell’s emphasis on communication.
“So long as you can communicate, it should be fine,” Beasley said.
Respect each other’s space
When a student moves in with a roommate after over a decade of living at home, adapting to the boundaries of a non-family co-resident can be a challenge. Every student interviewed agreed that mutual respect of each other’s space was vital to keeping the peace with their roommate.
For Beasley, he and his roommates found it helpful to agree to some ground rules for respecting their shared space.
“We have rules in place for how the apartment should work — trash, laundry, whatnot,” Beasley said. “So long as those (rules) are respected, I’d classify them as a good roommate.”
Keep an open mind
Even with some ground rules in place, entering new situations with pre-conceived notions is part of human nature. Still, an open mind can go a long way in preventing missteps commonly associated with being overly guarded.
“My best advice would just be to definitely keep an open mind (and) be adaptable,” Bell said.
Adding to Bell’s advice, Beasley explained why an open mind is so important for students living with roommates.
“Don’t immediately jump to conclusions,” Beasley said. “Don’t let these conclusions fully format your decisions going forward.”
In dealing with conflicts, Beasley advised roommates to “be sure to always get everybody’s side of the story before you actually pursue the path you intend to.”
Make the most of having built-in friends
Roommate horror stories have captivated viewers online, with Netflix even releasing a series dedicated to them, “Worst Roommate Ever.” However, many students experience a more positive reality.
“People always hear about the horror stories because that’s what grabs people’s attention,” Beasley said. “(But) don’t go into it expecting something horrific because you could wind up with friends (that) could last for life.”
In fact, Beasley described his first college roommate as “amazing,” despite not meeting in-person prior to moving in.
“We were really good friends,” Beasley said. “He helped me through some stuff.”
Avoid spending too much time at home
Even if roommates are the best of friends, spending too much time in close quarters with another person can lead to tension. Bell suggested that making good friends outside of his living space has helped him not spend as much time in his room.
“I’m doing things that I love when I’m not in the apartment,” Bell said. “So, I feel like when I come back, it doesn’t take me as long to wind down when I’m done with everything else because I’ve already had such a positive experience outside of my living arrangement.”
